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| A few years earlier my 30th birthday |
Yet.
It feels funny non to endure inwards the same decade anymore. I spent 10 years inwards my twenties (that's how math works). I was only a teeny tiny babe when I turned 20 x years go. It feels sooooooo long ago. And also, wasn't that only yesterday?
I tin all the same recall my start apartment. It was cramped too expensive but exhilarating.
I tin all the same recall my boyfriend. He's my hubby now.
I tin all the same recall my prison theatre cellular telephone phone. It did non convey Instagram.
I tin all the same recall beingness nervous close no longer beingness a teenager. Youth is wasted on the young.
I tin all the same recall my perfume. DKNY Be Delicious. A picayune also sugariness for me these days.
I tin all the same recall my style. Too many high heels. I'm lamentable feet.
And yes, I'll acknowledge that whenever I heard that person was 30, it e'er sounded too thence far away. And too thence old. How cliche.
In the final few years I've come upward to form of dread my birthday. Well maybe non dread. But avoid. Ignore. Downplay. And it's isn't too thence much because I dislike getting older. Because I don't. Getting older agency I'm doing it right. I'm successfully aging inwards the right direction. But I'm a beast of habit. Habit soothes me. It comforts me. And birthdays too other milestones disrupt my habit. It forces me to halt too think (ugh). I e'er convey this nagging feeling that a birthday is supposed to endure an event. It should experience meaningful. I should walk away feeling wiser or only about garbage. And the twenty-four hours doesn't alive upward to my ain expectations too thence I'm left feeling similar I did it wrong. Or only about garbage.
Just to re-iterate: I experience similar I celebrate my ain birthdays wrong. Yes, I sympathise how ridiculous that sounds.
And thirty is a milestone. It's all also much to handle! Too much pressure level to relish myself too historic menstruation gracefully. Maybe I only desire it to experience similar an ok twenty-four hours too historic menstruation somewhat gracefully amongst the occasional stumble.
That's ok, right? Ok.
So today, my 30th birthday, volition endure spent drinking tea for breakfast, catching upward on my fave YouTube beauty channels, going for a loooonnnng walk (in the thirty score weather condition no less), perchance taking a gander at Ulta's electrical current offerings, too spending the even out amongst my family. Doing normal things. No milestones. No expectations. Just the way I involve it.
And no high heels. (I'm lamentable feet).
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